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Everyone Has Something To Say

Some people never stop talking and some people just don’t say enough and most of us rarely say what we mean!

From out of all the chitter chatter in a relationship the types of conversation can be broken down into just three types. Everyone does them all and we need to be doing them all, but the third one in the list below is the only one that is going to make your marriage strong, healthy and long lasting.

1. CASUAL TALK. We do this all day long, these are the things that we need to say to take care of the business of everyday life. We need to know; who is going to shop for groceries, what time you will be home from work or who’s turn is it to change the diapers. This kind of talking must always be polite, respectful and happy.

2. CONFLICT TALK. This is the one that no one wants to do, where we deal with the inevitable conflicts and disagreements that come up between us. Conflict talk needs to take place only when both parties are ready and willing. It needs to be respectful and safe, without fighting and with trust. (Techniques for this will follow in future emails).

3. FRIENDSHIP TALK. This is the one that counts. Friendship talk is when you don’t need to say it to get through your day or week, so when you choose to communicate you are taking the opportunity to build intimacy and strengthen the connection between you.
This is talking about the things that matter to you or simply something that you want to share. Friendship talk is as simple as sharing what is going on in your day, at work of with the kids, or as significant as sharing your goals dreams and aspirations. It’s also listening carefully and supporting your mate when he or she is feeling vulnerable.
Friendship talking is what you did when you were falling in love and it needs to continue throughout your relationship. Without friendship talk you may forget what you brought you together and why you want to stay that way.

Keep talking and enjoy each others company.

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